A Quick™ and Easy™ Recipe™ for Dinner™!!

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Sunday, June 16, 2024

By:

Evan Erickson

It was a dark and humid night, the last of my pork carnitas was used up in one final batch of tacos. I was faced with a dilemma, what to eat tomorrow. That's when I remembered this Quick™ and Easy™ Recipe™ that I will get to right now.
 
First, you will need ingredients.  While there are many ways to procure ingredients, the most reliable way is to head over to a store and buy them yourself. It is highly recommended not to bring bags that will disintegrate a block from your dorm. This can easily cause you to lose your onion powder (of which you will need a few teaspoons for the recipe). You should also have a kitchen. Very useful prerequisite. Bonus if it has a working oven, stovetop (which you will need for cooking the pound of beef and cabbage), and refrigerator. If you can only get two out of the four burners working, that's fine, you only need one burner to have a favorite burner.
 
Okay, enough delaying, let's get to the Recipe™. I had to get the Recipe™ from my brother as the physical copy of the recipe was closest to him. I would have done this on my 70-minute commute back from my work after a long day of setting up interferometers and getting data off oscilloscopes, but my internet connection is very spotty. Thus, I often spend this time staring into nothing, contemplating random things, thinking about how I will need flour, sugar, butter, yeast, and eggs for the dough, and making notes about what I should do in the five hours I have before I go to bed, like creating a shopping list for this Delicious™ Recipe™.
 
One of the few perks of working full-time and having a hefty commute is that you avoid the worst of the DC summer weather. The hot and humid conditions during the bad days, comparable to the 350 oven you need to cook the Food™, can make even existing outside a chore.  However, on the nicer days with less humidity, it is nice to get out for a few hours, during which time the enriched dough you made will rise in the fridge. After learning that it is cheaper to fence off several blocks of road and charge 10 dollars for entry rather than letting people walk freely, the nearby Smithsonian Gallery of Art might serve as a good alternative to plans involving said several blocks. Before you wrap the beef/cheese/cabbage mixture in the dough, you can look upon some very nice oil paintings, wonder why sculptors keep making naked people, and get told to back away from a painting by staff and the automated security system, before making a 30-minute commute back which is the same length as you want to put these dough pieces in the oven.
 
Once you pull the Delicious™ Food™ from the oven. Let sit for a few minutes and enjoy!
 
(The author prides himself in making very straightforward recipes that are  not at all filled with obtuse anecdotes about his week)
 
 

Evan Erickson